here we go again | dyin2live's Blog

So here I go again...down this same rocky path I was on months ago.

I felt good on the Abilify, even when I did not take it every day.  But it was wrecking my liver, so now I can't take it.  I am not on anything...and in the past three days I have cratered faster than I did the last time around.

I want the world to stop again.  I want to go to sleep and have the sun never rise again.  I want to stop fighting these battles.  I am so tired.  I am so weary, all the way through...right to the bone. 

My personal relationships are crumbling again.  I am battling to do the right thing, say the right thing, be the right way... no matter what I do it is wrong.  It is all just...wrong.  I am wrong.  I am broken.  into a million tiny pieces, I am broken and I do not think there is anything out there that can fix me now.  That which can fix me will kill me.  Or I can just stay this way and end up dying anyway because those are the thoughts I am having again... 

i just need it all to go away.  i need it to stop.  now.